Many people believe getting married is the licensed to a happy life; an opportunity to share their burden with someone; an end to a lonely life; access to free sex, a cook for life, a provider of all their needs, someone to laugh
with; someone to build with. To them, marriage is like a dream come true.The excitement at the wedding tells it all. It’s no wonder some people assume that if they get married to even the wrong partner, marriage has the power to turn everything perfect. This is one of the reasons why others think when you are not married at a certain age, then either there is something wrong with you or you are cursed.
Marriage is a blessing, no doubt; a grace, but definitely not a paradise. Getting married to someone is like traveling overseas in a canoe. A journey to the unknown and uncertainty; A journey full of adventures. A journey that seems endless. A journey whose destination is death. Truth be told, traveling in a canoe in the middle of the sea is not a journey anyone should be happy about. What makes such a journey interesting, exciting and beautiful is that you are not alone. The presence of your spouse makes you forget the distance ahead, gives you courage to paddle without getting tired. In fact when you are in love, you do crazy things and marriage is one of such. One rule for such a journey is sharing. Couples are to share everything. Not to keep the other in the dark, hide things from each other. When we do that, it leaves one partner with imaginations, assumptions, and predictions. Such a mindset has the power to sink the boat.
As human as we are, from different homes and backgrounds, with different personalities and upbringing, we will never have one view although we look at the same picture. Our thoughts, ideologies, etc. will be different. To be able to get to your destination depends on how fast you resolve conflicts, differences, and issues that come up on the journey.
The longer it takes to resolve issues, the faster the canoe sinks. It may take longer to resolve issues when one spouse’s actions, words, and deeds hurt the other. Forgiving one another saves the union and keeps couples safe on their journey.
The one who is quick to condemn, point out faults, judge and criticize but very slow to forgive becomes a threat to the journey. He or she holds on to hurts and paddles their ego and stops paddling the canoe. They become distant; don’t care about the other, but rather look for ways and means to leave. Water soon starts entering the canoe, storms start coming towards their direction, and soon the canoe starts to sink.
They forget its “Our canoe” and not one person’s canoe. They no longer care to save the marriage. Any single person who is thinking of a marriage that lasts, one that travels to the end, needs a partner who never gives up even when they get hurt along the journey.
A partner who knows its “our canoe” and cannot allow ego or pride to destroy their union; but he or she is ready to let go anything that threatens the safety, happiness and the blessing they have.
Your best companion on the journey of marriage is someone who is a loser in the war of ego.
Someone who is ready to let your union win but let his or her ego lose.
In conclusion “Pride ends in a fall, while humility brings honor” –
may God continue to bless our relationship
Please share with your friends,